Open The Door Adventures : July 2014

And so I have decided to entertain you once again, during this break in the page updates and whatnot.

Uh... this one is going to be a little impromptu... so... uh...

how about some cat gifs?

You roll your eyes and sigh as I attempt to be either cute/funny or whatever

Well no attitude from you my good sir/lady. You aren't the one who is trying to keep your interest up in this postponed comic. You half-read this because it no longer matters and I could almost say anything here and you wouldn't care/notice because the wall of text is building and I am rambling... let's see how long I can go for. Nah, never mind, let's see if I can make up an impromptu ~~short~~ story right here, right now. Kay? Kay.

Stories usually have a beginning, and I guess this is what you could call this story's beginning. You are also reading this in Morgan Freeman's voice in your head. You smile at yourself when you hear his warm grandfatherly voice in your head. A voice that was graced by angels. And old people. When you mix angels, old people and Jesus together to get a narrator's voice, you get Morgan Freeman. But we're getting off the point. This, is not a story about Morgan Freeman, it is a story about a character that you are making up in your head on the fly. What do you see?

Hmm, sort of blurry. Here, let's clear that up a bit.

A young human male, about in his teens, sits at his desk. He has short, black hair that sits obediently in a dome on top of his head. Not like a afro, sort of like if Justin Beiber was a goth. His build is a bit lanky, but he mostly blames his mom for this because she would often forget his soccer practice, and that is why his muscles never show. On his nose sits a pair of glasses. He wears a pair of jeans and a cyan plaid flannel shirt over a plain white tee-shirt. What shall we name him? How about Victor. Yeah, sounds strong, and cool. Lets say it's spelled Victor, but he spells it V-I-K-T-O-R because it sounds cooler. Very macho indeed.

He scans his laptop for any trace of his IRL friends being online on social networking. No one is online at the moment, and he's sort of upset about that, but he decides to take a walk to the Seven Eleven a few blocks away just to escape the clutches of boredom. His neighborhood isn't very interesting. The normal houses with the same exact lay-outs strung like beads down the road, lit by the street lamps in the dusky evening. A few trees scattered here and there. That one over there even has a tire swing. The boy thinks, 'Wow, somebody's creative in decorating'. He usually does not think this sort of stuff, because he is a man. And that is not what real strong men think about. He shakes the un-manly thought from his head.

Exiting the neighborhood, 'Pine Way Crest' as the sign says, he takes a left and then a while later, a right and so on until he makes it to the Seven Eleven. Inside, he purchases a slushy. A manly coca cola slushy. Manly. The boy strides over to the cashier and hands over the money. The annoying cashier seems to think that a conversation would be a good thing to engage in right now, so he starts to blurb about this and that, how his aunt's second cousin's nephew's toaster isn't working, blah blah blah.

Just now he, the boy, realizes he forgot to tell his mom where he was going. He sighs and reaches for his phone in his pocket. It's not there. He now sees a vision of his phone sitting on his desk and his mom having a freak-out. He grips his forehead with his palm and clenches his teeth. 'I'm such an idiot!' he thinks to himself. The cashier continues to blurb. Victor continues to fret about the phone.

Blah blah blah, fret fret fret. This goes on for a few minutes before the door to the Seven Eleven opens again, and in comes a girl about Victor's age with a copious amount of brown curly hair. She wears a yellow knitted sweater with a pink heart stitched into the center, and a pink and blue skirt. She has white socks that come up to her knees, and a pair of brown school-girl shoes. She seems to have 3 Musketeers on her mind, but Victor straightens his posture to look more macho. He hears that's what girls like. Macho.
In the end, the girl decides against a 3 Musketeers and selects a jelly doughnut. The cashier finally finishes charging Victor and hands him the receipt. The cashier smiles at the girl and says, "Hello, Harriet. It's awfully late."
The girl smiles sweetly, and replies, "Hello, Gregory."
'Huh, Harriet. That's cute.' Victor thinks to himself. He then he remembers his current dilemma with his phone. He leans up against the counter and asks, "Uh, could I borrow a quarter for the pay phone?".
Now, some of you might ask, "what in the good name of God is a pay phone?" well, it's an endangered species of dinosaur that old people used to communicate before wireless phones. This Seven Eleven seemed to have one still, out side by the Red-Box. Gregory sighed and started rummaging through the cash register. The Harriet girl eyed Victor in a curious way. "Why do you need to use the pay phone?" She asked in an almost defensive tone.
Victor raised his eyebrow and replied, "Why do you need to know?"
"Why do you answer a question with a question?"
"I don't know, why do you?"
"Well the phone out there doesn't work. So give up."
Now Victor was interested in why this girl was being so defensive about a pay phone.
"Oh, then I guess I should get it serviced...?" the cashier asked cautiously, trying to stop an impending fight that seemed to threaten his Seven Eleven.
"No, that won't be needed, Gregory. I-I'm sure it's fine."
Now Victor started to wonder if she was hiding drugs in the phone to be so protective like this.
"I... I have to go. Goodbye, Gregory, and...?"
"Victor. With a K instead of a C."
"Yeah, okay. Well, goodbye, ViKtor with a K instead of a C."
The girl left the store with a sweeping motion or her brown sea-like hair. Victor forgot about his mom and his phone, and was lost in trying to find a way to find out what the problem was with the pay phone.

~Part Two;; The Pay Phone~

Victor got back home and apologized to his mother for not telling her where he had been. She forgave him but did threaten to tape his phone to him, so that he wouldn't forget it. He found a quarter in his room, and began to race back to the store. This time, he took his bike. His whole neighbor hood seemed to be full of mystery now, if something strange could be hidden in a pay phone, then what could be hidden in these seemingly normal houses? The one with the tire swing seemed to rouse the most suspicion and imagination.
He finally reached the Seven Eleven and darted towards the Pay Phone. He slipped the Quarter in and suddenly drew a blank on what to do. He had thought that his plan was flawless; to out whatever the girl was hiding, and then report her if it was serious. He did feel like a bit of a snitch for doing this, but he shrugged it off. But now he was at a blank. Was there a code to dial? Maybe he was just imagining her being defensive about the phone.
For lack of an idea of what to do, Victor punched in a string of random numbers: 1-5-6 3-8-2 0-2-1
and suddenly...!
Nothing happened.
He sighed and did a few more series of random numbers, none working, and then finally, he dialed:
7 11
A chute opened underneath his feet and swallowed him whole.
Victor found himself plummeting down, down, down, deep into the earth... or maybe not earth? It sort of felt like he was falling into outer space; there were clouds of stardust and stars everywhere. He wondered if he had died, or his imagination was playing with him, but the hard earth colliding with his body told him it was neither.
He looked up groggily, one of his glasses' lenses were cracked. He was laying on a bank next to a fluorescent stream. Large glowing blue mushrooms surrounded him, and few trees were flecked around to make a 'woods'. The grass was a strange murky greenish blue, sort of like this. Victor sat up and groaned. His back hurt horribly.

"Well I can see curiosity got the best of you." said a voice behind him. He already knew who it was.
"And here I was thinking you were hiding drugs or a body or something." Victor laughed weakly.
"Well, I warned you, Viktor with a K instead of a C. You're gonna regret not listening~!"
"Well I think I have six fractures, so I think I already am feeling regret."
Victor now noticed a small blue-ish turquoise cloud floating sheepishly behind Harriet's fluffy hair.
"Say hello to Fleep, my consort and high advisor."
The small cloud floated slowly towards Victor in a timid manor. To Victor's surprise, a small face appeared on the cloud. Not like a human face, more like a cartoonish tiny smile in between two dots for eyes.
"Oh my. I've never seen anyone besides Harriet that looks like you." Said the fluffly cloud.
"You appear to be the male counterpart to the species?"

Victor just stared at the talking cloud. Then he looked back at Harriet. Then back at the cloud. Then back at Harriet.
"Answer him, Vicky."
"What even is that?"
The small cloud appeared offended by this comment and made a 'humph' sound.
"I am a member of the Floof people! I am brave and proud! I accompany the alien Harriet in this world! I am the most mighty-"
"Thank you, Fleep, that will be all."
The small cloud harumphed again and a small bolt of lightning shot out underneath him. Victor chuckled.
"So am I dead or am I dreaming?"
Fleep floated over to him and produced a rainbow out of his side.
"If this was a dream, could I do this?"
With that, the small cloud smacked Victor upside the head with his rainbow appendage.
"Uh... You just smacked me with a rainbow."
The little cloud suddenly looked a little confused and then he replied gloomily,
"Oh... good point."
Harriet grabbed the cloud and shoved him under her right arm like a football. She grabbed Victor by the collar of his blue plaid flannel shirt, and started dragging him towards the woods.
"Hey, hey! Where are we going?"
"To see the King of the Floof People. All new subjects must be approved of."

~Part Three;; King of the Floofs~

At the end of the woods was a small village of clouds, all varying in color and shape. Some cracked lightning at the sight of Victor, while others just stared. The buildings sort of looked like smurf houses except they were purple and blue. The town was not much to look at, but for new eyes, it looked like something out of a child's story book. At some point or another, Victor decided he could walk on his own without the help of Harriet, thank you very much. He strode with as much macho swagger as he could muster. After all, he didn't need the humility of being dragged to this 'Floof King'.
On top of a high hill surrounded by glowing mushrooms and trees, what Victor presumed to be the Floof castle stood. It had towering spires that seemed to scrape the sky. The castle was the same blue and purple as the town's people's huts.
The trio crossed the moat that was filled with bubbling black goop, and reached the castle gate. Harriet reached up to the brass knocker and pounded in a strange pattern. A few seconds passed, and the door opened. Big intimidating cloud guards stared down at them, but when they noticed Harriet and Fleep, they nodded and allowed them access. However, they pushed themselves in Victor's way when he tried to join his comrades.
"Froof, Fleo, he's with us." Sighed Harriet.
The guards nodded and then let Victor through.
The interior of the castle was grand looking, and had the ambiance of clouds in space. Victor once again brushed the thought of interior and exterior designing out of his head because it wasn't manly enough for him, and he continued to follow Harriet through the halls. Finally, they reached the King's chamber, and Harriet knocked once again. The door opened instantly this time, and a humongous chamber was revealed. At the end of the chamber sat -or floated- a large pinkish-purple cloud with what appeared to be a cloud mustache and a crown. When the cloud spotted Harriet he smiled -or so that's what Victor thought he did, it was a bit hard to tell expressions with that mustache- and beckoned her to his presence.
"Good morning, your highness." Harriet beamed.
"Good morning, Harriet. Who is your guest?"
"He has come to be accepted into the kingdom."
"Wait, I have?"
"Yes. Now, your majesty, he is of my own species, and I wish for your permission to keep him."
"Where did you find him?"
"He fell from the sky."
"Do you think he has any knowledge of how to get to the surface?"
"I may be able to extract such knowledge if you let me keep him."
"Alright then, Harriet, I shall evaluate him."
The massive cloud turned towards Victor and glared down.
"Now, Harriet tells me you wish to join my kingdom?"
Victor glanced sideways at Harriet, who nodded vigorously outside of the King's vision.
"Uh... yes."
"Splendid. Now, you do promise not to hurt our dear Harriet? She is our only connection to the surface."
"I wouldn't hurt anyone. What do you mean, only connection to the surface?"
"I will be the one who asks the questions!" The King boomed intimidatingly.
"Oh-oh-oh k-kay." Victor said in a very un-manly tone.
"Do you know where the Sky Key is?"
"The Sky Key?"
The King suddenly seemed very unhappy that Victor had no knowledge of the 'Sky Key'.
"He has no knowledge of the Sky Key, Harriet, he is of no use to me."
"No! Please! I can teach him! We can find it together! Have you never heard the legend of how two Humans get magical Sky Key-sensing abilities when they are in close proximity to each other...?"
"You just made that up."
"No! It's true! Please! Just let him live! Please! He'll be useful to you, your Majesty!"
The King frowned and muttered something about how he liked to use the incinerator on failed subject applicators, and then he rolled his eyes.
"Fine. You have three days. If the Sky Key is not found, I will incinerate the visitor."
Harriet got on her knees and thanked the King, kissing-up and talking about how he would not regret this.

~Part Four;; The Legend~

Harriet, Fleep and Victor high-tailed it out of the castle and headed off for Fleep's house. Fleep had a considerably better house than the other clouds. It had a mansion-like feel to it. Pictures of cloud people decorated the walls. Fleep kept going on about how these were his ancestors, and what who did, and who begot who and so on and so on. Victor wasn't listening. He was looking at the sea of curly brown hair in front of him. It was very soft looking and bouncy. It sprung up and down whenever it's owner took a step. He liked the hair. He liked the owner of the hair.
"So... uh... did you save my life back there, or what exactly was going on?"
Harriet tossed aside her hair and looked at him.
"Okay, first Victor, do not tell anyone especially the King, that you meet me before you fell through the telephone. Fleep's in on it, because he's cool, but do not tell anyone else. Promise?"
"Uh, sure I guess. Why?"
"Because the King and the cloud people don't know that I can go back and forth between your world and this world."
"Why can't they know that?"
"The Floof people are a very war-driven people, just in case you didn't notice. They believe if they can reach our world they can dominate it."
"These cute little baby clouds, dominating our world? Ha!"
"No, I'm serious. They will take over the world. When I found the telephone, I was taken prisoner and was told I was to find the 'Sky Key'. I had no idea what that was at the time, and I was not sure of what to do. Then Fleep took me in, and taught me about the lore of the Floof people."
"... So... what's the sky key?"
Fleep floated towards them and cleared his fluffy throat.
"As a proud historian of the Floof people, I know all about the Sky Key. It is said that 100,000 years ago, a cloud found a hairless monkey. The hairless monkey had fallen through our atmosphere and was not sure of how to get back to his home. An Alien. How exciting! Anyway, the cloud took it to the king and explained the reason for the bald monkey's existence. The bald monkey explained that it had fallen from it's home and was not able to get back. The King was certain that the monkey's home was Heaven, and that if he could get the bald-monkey-angel back home, he could dominate heaven and be the greatest ruler who ever lived! So, the king ordered that a key would be crafted of the finest silver and gold, so that he could assist the monkey with finding his home. The rest of the tale was lost to the ages, and folklore simply ends it with the king dominating heaven. But we are unsure this is how it ends. Our people are sure that if they can find the key, heaven will be theirs again!"

A ripe pause settled while the trio were letting the tale sink in. The silence was broken by Victor.
"That sounds completely dumb."
Fleep was highly offended, and made scoffing noises out of disbelief. Harriet shooed the poor hurt Fleep from the room and confronted Victor. She made sure Fleep was gone before she said anything.
"Right, but here's the part they don't know; The key is bogus. I've found it. I have it hidden."
"... So why don't you give it to them and then get the heck out of this place?!"
"Because, if they find out I have it and it does not work, they will find out that humans themselves are the sky keys and then they will try to use you and me to get to our world!"
"So then... what now?"
"We leave. You and I. I've been searching for an idiot dumb enough to use the pay phone. That's why I became so protective of the phone. I wanted to raise your interest in it."
"Why do you need me?"
"Because I can't go past the Seven Eleven without a second person. Thats what it says in the other half of the legend."
"Fleep just said that was lost to the ages!"
"Yes, and so was the key, but I found them both in a cave!"
Out of her hair she pulled a small roll of paper and a gold and silver key. She unfolded the paper and read;
"But the Floof King was foolish, for the true sky keys were the hairless monkeys themselves. He only brought death and destruction to his kind. The bald monkey eventually found his way home through a mountain pass, but was never able to leave the area of the hole within 20 feet. And he died there. According to magic, if he had had a second human with him, the magic bond would be broken and he would have been free. But he died. The end."
She looked up at Victor. Victor had a mildly disturbed expression.
"Well... that was... to the point... and descriptive... and a bit poorly written."
"Yeah. But the point is, we need to leave together. I just want to go home."
"Alright. Let's do it. Let's go home. "

~Part Five;; Home~

The two snuck out of the house early in the morning. Fleep was still in sleep status. The two traveled through the woods and up the high mountain with it's treacherous crumbling trail. Victor almost fell a few times, but was saved by Harriet. Not vey macho, but at least he was alive. It was strange, because in Floof land the sun never rose, and it was constantly dark. It made it a bit hard to see. "Where did you say this passage was?" Victor grumbled.
"Just -pant- up -pant- ahead." Harriet wheezed.
Harriet seemed really tired, the hike here was really long. Victor thought of a manly thing to do when a lady was in need. Then he offered, "Hey, do you want me to carry you the rest of the way on my back?"
"Like -gasp- a -pant- piggyback? I can make it there myself, I am a perfectly capable lady."
with that, she tripped and fell on the twisty path. While on the ground she mumbled;
"Or maybe a piggyback wouldn't be a bad thing."

Victor hoisted the tired Harriet up onto his back and began on the trail again. They reached the cave where the passage was, and Harriet, who was thankful for Victor's courteous gesture kissed him on the cheek and then went into the cave. Victor blushed, but slapped himself in the face because this was again, unmanly, and followed her. The cave was very dark and damp. He couldn't see Harriet. "Harriet...?"
Suddenly something pushed him on the ground and held his shoulders with it's hands. Victor had hit his head on a rock and small lights in different colors slowly danced across his vision.
"Harriet! Help me!"
A little girlish giggle echoed through the cave.
Victor could feel the presence of a head leaning in closer, closer, closer until it had reached his ear.
"Sorry Vicky but it's confession time." The voice sad a bit sadly.
"Harriet? Get off!"
"I have a little sin to admit, Victor with a K instead of a C. I've been lying to you this whole time. I am the Queen of the Floof people, the 'King' you met was just one of my larger subjects that I ordered to 'fill in' for me. It's been a jolly good elaborate hoax the whole time. A hoax I've played on many other humans before. Nothing is real. Not even the key. I can go up to the surface whenever I please to get a jelly donut without another human or key because I am the Queen. I was once a human girl, but years under here has made me something much different."
Victor was disturbed by all of this and chuckled nervously.
"o-oh k-k-kay, Queen Harriet, you've had your laugh. N-now let me up and we can be good friends..."
"You wanna know how I've lived so long, Vic? By playing this game. And you wanna know how it ends?"
Harriet lunged for his neck and bit down hard. It hurt excruciatingly, but strangely, no blood came out. Victor's body started to glow an eerie blue color, and Harriet started to glow pink. The blue in his body started to condense near his neck and started to flow into Harriet. Victor started to feel drowsy. Lines blurred between reality and hallucination. Then Victor realized something horrible, she wasn't sucking blood, she was sucking his soul out.
"Harriet..." he moaned feebly. "Y-you don't have to do this... you're a good and sweet person. I don't know if anyone's told you that. But it's true..."
Harriet looked up.
"Fool, I was pretending the whole time."
"But I thought I saw past that... I thought I saw a better person underneath."
"I'm not even a person anymore."
"And who told you that? Sure you've resorted to sucking the very life force out of other humans, but sometimes, people aren't made up of what they've done. I can tell it's hurting you as much as it's hurting me to suck my soul out of me. See, you're still the old you under there. It's never too late to change."
Harriet stared at him with a somber expression. Then she burst into tears.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry about every single person I've brought into this cave! I remember all of their faces! I'm such a monster! How did it come to this? When I found this place I thought it would be like my own Alice in Wonderland Experience, but when I learned what it took to stay alive here, I learned this place was terrible! It's hell! It's hell!"
Victor sat up and cradled Harriet's head in his lap.
"A-and the worst part is, I remember them all, they treated me like a friend. They all did something for me before I robbed them, like when you brought me up the mountain. So unselfish! Why? I didn't understand! You would help me in bringing you to your own death. It was the worst. I want to die."
"No you don't." Victor said, petting her fluffy, soft hair. "You just have not seen the light in a long while. That's what you need. The light."
"Psh, no light can help me now."
"No, I mean sun light. It was 7:30 when I saw you in the Seven Eleven. The sun does not rise here. When was the last time you'd been to the surface when the sun was up?"
"... The last time I saw the sun was when I fell through the hole..."
"Exactly. Now, Harriet, lets go home."

~Part Six;; Sunlight~

"Focus on the Seven Eleven. Focus. Our minds must be in sync." Harriet said, placing her thumb on Victor's forehead.
"Got it."
"You're not focusing hard enough."
"I am too!"
"How would you know, have you done this before?"
"No, but I'm focusing really hard!"
"We fight like an old couple."
"Maybe we will be eventually...?"
"I will punch you."
They both laughed and then remembered what they were doing. Going home. They focused on the Seven Eleven, and Harriet started mumbling something. The next thing Victor knew he had a floaty feeling and the space between his eyes and his eyelids had gone white. Then a spinning, dizzy feeling like being on a merry-go-round, and then a descending feeling. When he opened his eyes he was laying in the bark dust under a tree that was next to the Seven Eleven. He looked up and squinted, because the sky was so bright. There was the sun. Big, warm, nourishing and beautiful. Victor smiled and let himself soak up the sun. He looked over and there was Harriet laying on the ground. She moaned and squinted. "It's really bright."
Victor chuckled. "Yeah. It is isn't it."
"It also feels... really... good."
"So... d'ya think you're gonna stay up here with me?"
"Yeah. I think I will."
And it seemed like good closure for a story. There was only one problem.
"Oh no."
"What?"
"I forgot to tell my mom how long I was going to be gone."